Last night, I played my first game of Mille Bornes with tripoverthings, and I got an idea for a Mille Bornes movie. (If you haven’t played Mille Bornes, it’s motor vehicular eff you in French card game form.) It’s an avant-garde French film, maybe black and white. Two Frenchy l’Frenchertons are standing in a driveway beside their cars. They’re wearing berets and striped mime shirts, and they have very thin mustaches. They might be wearing scarves and/or driving gloves, perhaps even those old timey driving goggle things. If so, their cars will have to be Model T’s or something. Only one at a time is allowed to move; the other fellow will stand still until it’s his turn, unless there’s a coup forre. They take turns screwing with each other. Perhaps the first fellow lets the air out of one of the other fellow’s tires. Then the other fellow uses his turn to smash the first fellow’s car with a tire iron. That fellow might then have his car repaired, perhaps in a movie magic kind of way to keep the tempo up – he might just snap his fingers or do an “I Dream of Jeannie” blink. The coup forre would best be acted out by one Frenchy blocking the other Frenchy’s attempt to smash his car with a tire iron. I’m picturing a crossed-swords suspense moment, only with tire irons. Then maybe a ‘60s Batman style word bubble pops up on the screen: COUP FORRE! It’s a silent film. Someday they'll make a musical out of it.